iKnow How You Feel
by K9GM3
Summary: Wendy knows that Sam's affections lie elsewhere. When has that ever stopped a person in the pursuit of love?
1. iEstablish The Setting

_Target acquired. All sensors locked on Puckett. Preparing to engage._ She was well aware how nerdy it sounded, but Wendy didn't think nerdiness was necessarily a problem. Shane managed to put every girl's panties in a twist, Wendy's included, and he was an incredible nerd when it came to technical stuff. Besides, even if nerdiness wasn't OK, it wasn't like anyone could read the redhead's thoughts. The only indication they received was a slight quiver of the lips, hinting at a suppressed smile – to decipher nerdiness from that would require abilities on par with Wendy's own.

She discovered her talent shortly after her seventh birthday. Or rather, that was when other people started noticing. Wendy herself had always considered it normal. The psychiatrist described it as "an extensive understanding of body language and inflections, combined with an amazing memory for personality traits, quotes and mannerisms". In simpler terms, Wendy was a mind reader and an empath to the highest extent that reality allowed. Add a large amount of curiosity and good social skills; suddenly one understands why Wendy always seemed to know everything about everyone.

The first time Wendy experienced love first-hand was with a boy: Alex Rose. The joke of A. Rose was quickly discovered by her classmates and exploited for weeks of bullying. Wendy, feeling sorry for the boy, was among the few who defended him, earning her his gratitude and affection. Eventually, this led both of them to their first kiss.

The second time was with a girl: Jess Harisson. To notice the other girl's feelings was a bit of a surprise to Wendy. An even bigger surprise was when she realised those feelings were mutual. Her parents were surprised to hear of their daughter's bisexuality, but they were fairly accepting. Whereas Alex gave Wendy her first kiss, Jess gave Wendy her first orgasm.

The third time was with another girl: Sam Puckett. Wendy had managed to keep her feelings hidden for a while, knowing that Sam didn't return her affection. However, she quickly realised that to love from a distance is even worse than not loving at all. With that in mind, Wendy decided to try and make Sam return her feelings. _Target acquired. All sensors locked on Puckett. Preparing to engage._

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**A/N: Hurray, a new story. This one's narrated by Wendy, with Sam as the focal character. Why doesn't this chapter follow that format? Well, if a respected member of the literary community were to ask, it's because prologues don't necessarily follow the format of the rest of the story. Just between you and me, I simply had no idea how to do character exposition in that format.**

**On that note, please let me know what you think of my interpretation of Wendy. Or my approach of the Sandy ship. Or my writing. Or any other reason this story **_**SUCKS**_**. In short, please leave a review.**


	2. iExpand On The Plot

You notice me staring. At first, you think nothing of it, assuming I'm just waiting for you to do something violent. Since Freddie is nearby, you don't mind meeting that request. He rubs his now-bruised shoulder, asking you what that was for. You blame it on me, but when you turn around to give me a thumbs-up, you realise that I'm still staring. You frown and walk over. Of course you don't apologise to Freddie. How much you punch him is only a measure of how much you love him, or so Carly tries to assure him.

"What's so interesting?" you ask, still carrying that intimidating frown. Many confessions have been pulled out by that look; I always thought I was immune to it. I was wrong.

"You are." Well, that sounded weird. "You're interesting." Better, but still weird. You ignore my choice of words and the obvious implications behind them, instead thinking of it as purely platonic flattery. If only you knew.

"Yeah, I'm pretty cool, aren't I?" You flash me that confident, wide grin. It feels great to be the target of it. So much, in fact, that I forget to listen as you keep on talking. Knowing you, however, you probably wanted more flattery; a detailed explanation of why you're so interesting. If you knew me better, you'd know that such a question will lead to brutal honesty. Whether brutal honesty is a good idea around you, I'm not sure. It probably isn't.

"You carry romantic feelings for both your best friends. You feel guilty and confused: you claim to hate one of them and the other is a girl. That's why you try to ignore your feelings for Carly and mask your feelings for Freddie under violence and abuse. However, this behaviour creates a lot of sexual tension between the three of you. You want an outlet for that tension, but you can't give in to your feelings. You're afraid that you might scare them away. That's why you're always chasing after other boys. It's partly denial, and partly an outlet for bottled lust."

Throughout my analysis, you constantly look around for people entering earshot. You do not try to interrupt me – curiosity is preventing you from it. Only when I'm finished do you pretend to disagree, but you know it to be true. You don't want it to be true, you certainly don't want to think about it, but you can't help it. Not now that it's been laid out so clearly for you.

"You're making this chizz up." – "I'm not." – "…You are too."

Eventually, you decide to screw my theory and return to Carly and Freddie. However, our little talk just can't escape your thoughts. It's in the way you act cautious around Carly, the way Freddie suddenly receives much less abuse. It will not get out of my head either, albeit for completely different reasons. I didn't tell you the most important part. I didn't tell you that I was available as an outlet.

Judging by the way you keep sneaking glances at me, I think I'll get a second chance.

* * *

Indeed, you come over to me after school. I open my mouth to greet you, but your glare is sufficient interruption. You look around to make sure that nobody can overhear our conversation, take a deep breath and ask the question that was undoubtedly on your mind throughout the day. I knew it would be coming, once you'd accepted your own feelings.

"Do they like me back?" You're having trouble with this question. You're not used to being dependant on somebody, especially not a person that qualifies as little more than an acquintance. Still, here you are, asking me if you have any chance with the objects of your affection. Another thing you're not used to: usually, you can just take what you want. Boys are reluctant to turn you down, fearing that you'll hurt them if they say no. You probably would. You'd probably hurt me if I give you the wrong answer. I'm not sure if I'd mind.

"Freddie doesn't like you. Not that way, at least. He considers you a very close friend, but no more than that. Carly used to have a crush on you, but she was scared that you'd be weirded out. She's getting over it, but there's still some leftover feelings." And now for the big reveal. "There's... another person who likes you, by the way." I expect curiosity or flattery. 'Oh, who is this mysterious admirer?' Instead, you give me complete indifference. My only consolation is that you think it's some random guy.

"Yeah, well, good for him. So do I have a chance with Carly?" I bite my lip. Do I lie to you and try to get you on the rebound or or do I tell the truth and wait for a better moment? I decide to take a middle road.

"It's… complicated. If you come over to my place, maybe we can talk about it. You know, more privately." You nod and text Carly, probably to tell her why you won't be going over to hers this afternoon. Part of me feels victorious, another part feels envious. I want to be the one you go to by default. Perhaps I can convince you of it. Perhaps you'll fall for me instead.

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**A/N: Looks like Wendy's going to have to earn her happy ending, eh?**

**Yadda yadda please review blah blah blah.**


	3. iBuild Up To A Climax

Silences don't have to be awkward, I'm pretty sure of that. There's such a thing as a simple pause in between lines of conversation, where neither party speaks because neither party really has anything to say. It's the kind of silence where the company of the other person is sufficient in itself, with no need for conversation to maintain a connection. That kind of silence would've been possible between you and me, if not for the fact that we're pausing a conversation on how you can seduce another girl.

You still aren't aware of my hidden affections. Another reason this silence feels awkward to me. Not the best way to break a silence, is it? _'By the way, I totally have a crush on you.'_ When I see your surprised stare, I realise that I said that out loud. Whoops.

"You… have a crush on me?" And here we were, thinking that the silence was awkward. I just nod; the secret has been revealed, might as well make the best of the situation. You go quiet for a moment, thinking the situation over. Once you collect your thoughts, you ask the most obvious question: "So why are you helping me get Carly?"

"Because…" And then what do I say? Because I wanted you to use those tips on me? Because I needed an excuse to keep you in my room? Because I want you happy, even if it's with somebody else? Actually, they all sound pretty accurate. During my explanation, your confusion gradually fades. However, a second wave of confusion kicks in when I'm finished. You're not sure how you feel about me. Until today, you were in denial about your feelings for Carly and Freddie. Now you're acting on those feelings, a testament to how quickly your mindset can change.

Slowly but surely, your thoughts progress to a conclusion. You realise that we haven't interacted as much as you and Carly, that perhaps your feelings for your best friends has overshadowed your feelings for other people; you also realise that you may have been in denial about other people – other girls, to be exact. Above it all, you realise that you have nothing to lose with me. That alone would make me a much safer option than Carly. You normally love risks, but not when Carly is involved. You don't want to risk what you have with Carly. You pick me, because Carly means so much to you.

Your thoughts translate to actions. You lean towards me, I lean towards you. Just before our lips meet, you look towards the window. You're having second thoughts, you're not sure if this is the right decision. You continue anyway.

We finally kiss.

Your doubt is still present, but not nearly as prevalent as earlier. This may not be what you initially hoped for, but it's still pretty good. You could get used to this. You could grow to love me – you could get over Carly and focus on me instead. Part of you still tells you to follow your heart, but that part is quickly shushed by the voice of reason. You enjoy what you have with Carly; you enjoy what you can have with me. You now have something that will make you happy, which you don't want to risk for an uncertain outcome. Your doubt is still present, but it's pushed away. You've made your choice.

* * *

We greet each other in the morning. You apologise for the shirt you ripped open, I easily forgive you. The circumstances made it OK. In fact, anything less would have been a disappointment. We come up with an explanation for why you spent the night (I know my brother is on to something, but if he blabs, you could always beat him with a frozen bra), have breakfast together and head to school.

You're not looking forward to confronting Carly. You know it has to be done, but that doesn't mean you like it. I squeeze your arm ever so lightly, to let you know that we're doing this together.

Freddie's reaction is as we expected – surprised but accepting. Carly's reaction is… mixed. She's relieved, as this development allows her to move on. However, she's also worried that I'll replace her as your best friend. After you convince her that nothing will change, she mostly accepts our relationship. _Mostly_. There's that slight hint of envy, a leftover of the feelings she used to have. You don't notice, but I do.

In a weird twist, I end up being the one in doubt. I'm not like you. I can't push away my doubt. When I'm in doubt, the doubt only grows.

* * *

We talk. You don't understand – isn't this what I wanted? It is. But it's not what you wanted, and I wanted you to want me. So in a way, it's not what I wanted either. You yell, then I yell, then you leave.

I know exactly where you're going. I tell myself that this is how it should be, that to try and change it would be selfish. Yet I silently plead for you to turn around and come back. It won't happen. I know exactly where you're going.

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**A/N: That has to be the quickest relationship ever. Started and ended in a single chapter. Surely it's not over yet?**

**Indeed it's not: there's one more chapter. Expect it sometime this week. In the meantime, why not write a review? I do love reading reviews.**


	4. iEnd The Story

You exit my house, slamming the door for emphasis. You pass underneath my window, making sure not to look up. As I expected, you're heading in the direction of Bushwell Plaza. Towards Carly, just like I said you should. You belong with her. I shouldn't even enter the equation. You don't belong with me.

So why is it that you're the only thing I can think about? Your trip plays out in my mind, even when I'm not there to see it…

_You ride as fast as you can. You arrive at Bushwell, don't even bother with locking your bicycle and rush straight past that weird doorman yelling at you. You fly up the stairs, two steps at a time, only to come to a grinding halt before her door._

'_What if she really did move on', you ask yourself. You glance at the stairs you just ran up, considering to just leave and accept being alone. However, you remember my words. You know that you belong with Carly, and that it's a risk worth taking. So you knock._

_The door opens, Carly stares at you. You ask if you can come in, she invites you to do so. She sees that something is troubling you. You didn't just barge in, you're not as chatty as usual, you don't inquire about her fridge. You sit down, she sits next to you. You take a deep breath and begin talking._

_You tell her that hooking up with me was a mistake. That you didn't want to ruin the friendship. That you only went with me because I was available and safe. That you're willing to do whatever it takes to make a relationship work, that you're sorry for making her wait so long. And all she does is listen, until the moment you finish talking. That's when she leans in and kisses you softly._

_You forget everything. You forget the troubles at home, the leftover feelings you still have for Freddie, the many difficulties that will surface in a relationship with Carly. You also forget me and my broken heart. When the kiss deepens, you even forget where you are. So does Carly. One of your hands is already toying with the hem of her shirt, while her hands firmly grip your butt…_

The phone rings, interrupting my thoughts. I check the display; the number is unfamiliar. The voice on the other side isn't, but hearing it is nevertheless unexpected.

"Wendy here."

"Wendy, it's Freddie."

"Oh, hey. Why a–"

"It's Sam. She's on my couch asking for you; I don't know what to do with her. Can you come over?"

"Why? What happened?"

"She just came from Carly's… I think something happened between them."

"…I'll be right there."

As I hang up the phone, understanding sinks in. Things didn't quite go the way I thought they would. Once I exit the building, another realisation pops up. If you're showing Freddie and me this vulnerable side, things have gone horribly wrong.

You're sitting on Freddie's couch; at first glance, you're holding up just fine. I say "at first glance" because I can tell that you're holding back tears. I ask Freddie to get you some water and sit down next to you. You look at me, confused and sad. When you speak, it doesn't even resemble your usual tone.

"She said she moved on. She got over me when she found out about… us, and she didn't want to change her mind again. I was too late."

"I'm sorry…"

"You said she'd want me back."

"I know. I'm really sorry."

"…Yeah, I know."

Freddie comes in with two glasses of water, which you thank him for – you're thanking Freddie! He's as surprised as I am, but quickly recovers with a "you're welcome". Once he leaves, we find ourselves in yet another awkward silence.

"So where does that leave us?" you ask, actualising the question that was on both our minds. Another long silence falls, which you eventually break with a not-so-subtle expression of impatience. I shake my head and mutter something about not being sure. You're on the rebound, confused and vulnerable, and I'm not sure if I'm okay with being a second choice.

Freddie comes back in. He overheard the conversation, but thankfully doesn't bring it up. Instead, he just tries to be there for you. I do the same: I'm not sure about a relationship, but there's no reason I can't be a friend. You leave the apartment in a much better mood than when you entered. Still, I know that you'll stare at Carly's door before leaving.

You approach me two weeks later. Even though we haven't spoken since that time on Freddie's couch, I think I know where this is going. Indeed, you stand in front of me and demand an answer. I look into your eyes, noticing one important thing. Carly is standing further down the hall, but you refuse to look at her while you talk to me. Not even a single stolen glance.

You got over her, just like how she got over you. Now you're going with the girl who willingly broke her own heart for your happiness. It's dedication you won't get from anyone else, and you know it. Perhaps a solid relationship can grow out of appreciation; perhaps love can grow out of it, we don't know. But you're willing to try – you _want_ to try.

I don't answer. I just lean in to kiss you. Behind you, Carly gives me a small smile. She got over you, just like how you got over her. No hard feelings. She's happy for us. When we break apart, you turn around towards her, receiving that same smile. You return it. No hard feelings.

After school, we spend the rest of the day at my house. We tell my parents, we go upstairs, we get interrupted by my brother, we threaten him with a frozen bra to keep our bedroom activities quiet. It's pretty much what I expected, except for one thing.

"I love you, Sam."

"…"

"…You don't have to say it back."

"Thanks."

"Don't mention it."

I know it's not perfect. But it's still pretty good.

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**A/N: The reason this chapter is so late is because I was never satisfied with the ending. In the original ending, Sam ended up with Carly, leaving Wendy heartbroken and alone. Other endings considered were Seddie, OT3 (Sam/Carly/Wendy) and everybody loses. In the end, I went with this ending because I just have a bit of a soft spot for Wendy.**

**Please, do let me know what you think =)**


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